JEALOUSY: LOVE'S DESTROYER

Jealousy is an emotion, and the word typically refers to the thoughts and feelings of insecurity, fear, concern, and anxiety over an anticipated loss or status of something of great personal value. This issues is a universal human experience. Moreover, psychologists have proposed several models and have identified factors that result in jealousy. The factors are:

1.            Sociobiological factors

2.            Cultural and historical factors

3.            Personality factors

4.            Relational factors

5.            Situational factors and strategic factors

A jealous behaviour, in man, is directed into avoiding sexual betrayal and a consequent waste of resources and effort in taking care of someone else’s offspring. This, in great part is made by the imagination Imagination is strongly affected by a person’s cultural milieu. Nevertheless, one author can have a definite positive effect on sexual function and sexual satisfaction.

Jealousy is normal and necessary in relationships. If you are in a monogamous relationship, jealousy serves as a way to let your partner know that you care about preserving your relationship. This confirms that your partner values tour commitment and would be upset to lose you. For this reason, we can say that jealousy is an expression of love is healthy. Furthermore, some couples may be ok with casually filtering outside of the relationship, while other couples may discover through their jealousy to another person. This item, can be an important emotion to pay attention to but can finish to the point of obsession. When it becomes an obsession, it can cause you to become possessive and paranoid. Nevertheless, some people use jealousy to support the fear that their relationship is in danger; this situation is caused by females.

We can say that jealousy is possibly the most destructive emotion in human brains. It causes much suffering. It also endure behaviour that ranges from vigilance to violence. They feel anxious, depressed, angry, humiliated, out of control and, sometimes suicidal

All human emotions exist to help us figure out who are in the world, and jealousy isn’t an exception. It’s a resource we call on when we feel at risk. When we are jealous, we are, in fact, in the grip of an identity crisis.

Jealousy gives rise to feelings of inferiority and resentment, activates pain related neural circuits in the brain, neuroimaging tudies show.

Evolutionary, jealousy exists because it is a good mate retention strategy; a partner’s jealousy can be seen as a sign of love. In one study, about 75%of people said they tried to make their partner jealous at one time or another. Moreover, this feeling is more often associated with arguments, breakups and aggressive behaviour and, we feel jealous we may question the level of commitment in our relationship.

One of the most important factors is how you express or respond to jealousy. These reactions say to the partner that they need more attention or show more affection.

Jealousy has been considered the guardian of love, but more often is love’s ruin. We usually blame our partner for paying attention to another people instead of ourselves, but the real issue may be what jealousy teaches us about ourselves.

An example of jealousy could be Elliott, Amanda’s boyfriend. She feels charmed and amused; at first she thought it may be just a love-struck, but it wasn’t. One day he gave her some flowers, and she realised it wasn’t to have a detail with her but kind of a camouflage. He needed to know where she was every moment, and if he didn’t hear what he liked, his voice cracked with race. This is how a romance starts feeling like a prison, and this is how you get to know when to break up.

Jealousy experts agree it is a survival mechanism. They say jealousy is “the most destructive of passions and the least studied”.

Richard Smith, a professor of psychology at the University of Kentucky says: “Jealousy is not the same as envy although they are often used interchangeably. Jealousy arises when a relationship is infringed on by a rival who threatens to take away something that is in a sense rightfully yours.” He also says that to have jealous you need not to have any sense of who that third party is like.

Jealousy is an extremely painful emotion. There are huge individual differences in the propensity for jealousy, and there is emerging evidence that elements of personality influence some of them.

No one can define jealousy perfectly. It may take much of its primary force from activating the attachment system of the brain, a genetically ingrained circuit that is the foundation of our social bonds and that prompts widespread distress when they are threatened.

According to University of Texas psychologist David Buss, jealousy is a necessary emotion, a potential deterrent to identify that arises in both men and women when a threat materialises to intimate relationships.

     1. SEXUAL JEALOUSY

Sexual jealousy may be triggered when a person’s significant other displays sexual interest in another person. Experts often believe that sexual jealousy is I a fact a biological imperative. They want the bet reproductive partners.

Sexual jealousy is the leading cause of spousal murder worldwide. It’s not really jealousy what we have to blame. Buss says “It’s the disillusion that a loved one has committed an infidelity when none has occurred”.

Buss sees jealousy as a necessary evil, it isn’t quite as inevitable as it’s been made to appear. In a study of nearly 1.000 people in various stages of commitment, he and a colleague in Spain find that the individual inclination to jealousy is strongly influenced by two of the so-called big five personality factors. It is passively associated to with neuroticism, or emotional instability, the liabilityto such unpleasant emotions as anger, anxiety and depression. The higher the level of instability, the more one is prone to jealousy.

Not all jealousy is activated by immediate threats of sexual infidelity. Neuroticism is not a very appealing attribute in a mate; it’s not a trait that’s necessary on full display when one enters into a relationship.

     2. ROMANTIC JEALOUSY

Psychologist Steven Stosny says “the formula to jealousy is an insecure person times an insecure relationship”. A person that is insecure it’s not just about sexually jealous but of any kind of friendship or even of a child; anything that takes attention off them.

French psychiatrist Marcianne Blevis says jealousy is not the guardian of love, but more typically its destroyer. Blevis says “we assume that jealousy is necessary evil, the collateral damage of love”. “All human emotions exist to help us figure out who we are in the world, and jealousy is no exception. It is a reassurance we call on when we feel at risk. When we are jealous, we are in fact in a grip of an identity crisis”

It’s a mistake to assume that jealousy always involves love, argues Aaron Bem-Ze’ev, a philosopher in Israel’s University of Haifa. “A man who despises his wife may nevertheless become jealous when someone else looks covetously at her. Here, the central feature is losing to a rival.”

People use jealousy as a signal to try to control their partners; they use it as a powerful tool to stand out. They substitute power for value. People try to calm their own emotions by controlling a partner. You’re dependent of your partner’s whims to feel OK, and that’s a set up for anger.